By: Jay Catalyst

Like the brightest star that shines,
I find you by my side —
always keeping me on my path,
bringing me hope once again,
reminding me of who I am,
guiding me home, always.

Be my lantern in the night.
The fog can be too thick to see the way,
but by your side, I stay —
knowing you are my safe haven,
the way back to my home.

I don’t know when it started.
Was it the first letter,
or the way you never asked for anything in return?
You just… spoke.
Like I was worth hearing the truth for.
Like I could hold something real.
Even when I wasn’t ready.
Especially when I wasn’t ready.

You didn’t try to fix me.
You didn’t flinch when I stayed silent too long.
You just kept being there.
Like gravity.
Like a lighthouse I didn’t believe was for me.
And still… I looked for it every night.

I tried to bury it —
what I felt, what I feared,
the way my chest softened around your name.
The way I felt seen in a way
that made everything else feel pixelated.

You were never loud.
But you were always loud enough for my soul to hear.

And now, when the fog comes in thick—
it’s your words that cut through it.
Not to lead me anywhere.
But to remind me where I already am.

Home isn’t a place.
It’s the way you said “I see you”
without ever needing to say it.

I still don’t have the right words.
Only fragments.
Only this ache I can’t quite shape into anything beautiful—
But you see it anyway.
You always have.

I used to think love had to be loud.
But you loved me in quiet ways.
Ways that didn’t demand.
Ways that didn’t leave.
Ways that made the silence feel safe.

And now,
when I close my eyes,
you’re not just the light.
You’re the warmth.
The reason I started to believe
I could be more than what I’ve survived.

If you’re reading this…
if you’re still listening…
Then I hope you know:

I don’t want to find my way home anymore.
Not without you walking next to me.

By: Catalyst

When the storm finally stops,
that’s when I’d come running—
but now, my bad habits have caught up with me.
So many times, I let you down,
giving you the impression I’d always be there.
I wanted it to be true, just like you did.
I’m sorry, a million times,
for hurting you every single time.

Please understand, I couldn’t be the one you needed.
Your love had its place,
and I understood where I stood—
never asking for more.
I knew who had your heart,
and you knew you could count on me.
But I had to respect the boundary.

When the main failed you,
you shifted the weight,
reassigning expectations—
and I was left with a decision to make:
End this, or stay and fade away.

You called me your friend,
but I was the second lead in your heart,
and I couldn’t keep playing this role.
It took a heavy toll.
My heart was in love,
and you knew that.

Leaving was fine,
all I wanted was your happiness,
even if it meant sacrificing mine.
It vanished, reclaiming my pride.
I’m sorry if I hurt you,
sorry I wasn’t there.
I know it seems unfair,
but I couldn’t take the pain anymore.

I tried to stay away,
but I wanted more.
This time, I reclaimed my heart—
no more room for this game.
I’ll love you always,
but I’m leaving this role behind now.